so I'm up way too late

...on a Sunday morning (it makes sense in my mind, at least)...and it's one of those nights when the simple things are fascinating, reminiscences wash over me at the slightest provocation, and everything in me reaches out to God like a child who wants to be picked up SO badly when Daddy gets home from work, for the security of the hug and the strong arms around you. Oh man, life is hard. I've had some verses from Galatians in my head all day. "I have been crucified with Christ, I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live through the Son of God, who loves me and gave himself for me. I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness can be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing." or something to that effect...I'm writing from memory here. Basically, my identity is something I've been struggling with lately. Who am I really? Am I defined by my friends, my hobbies, my circumstances, my family, my job, the music I listen to? And the only answer I come up with to those is an overwhelming NO! The problem is, I so often find myself doing exactly that; defining myself by those things, instead of by the fact that I'm a saint. I'm a child of God, saved by Christ, and heirs with Him to the Kingdom of God. God looks at me and doesn't see all of the surrounding noise of life; He sees me, the one He knew even before I was born, washed in the blood of His Son, whose days are carefully numbered and watched by Him as He continually shows me His faithfulness, proving over and over again that He is utterly trustworthy. As the prophet Zephaniah said, He is mighty to save, and He rejoices over me with singing. My name is written on the palm of His hand. Nothing else matters. My identity is entirely swallowed up in the sea of grace that flows over me, and through me to the rest of the world. God's heart is for the lost people in the world, the hurt, the struggling, and the ones who think they're "good enough" to get into Heaven, only to realize in the end, too late, that Christ is the only Way. What am I doing with my life that reflects His glory to the lost and broken? I am His, and His alone, and like Paul said, I want to be "Like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and in truth [with Christ]." That's in Philippians chapter 2, btw. I want to "do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than [myself]." To "look not only to [my] own interests, but also to the interests of others." To have the same attitude of Christ, who was willing to be made nothing so that God's glory could defeat death, and make us more than conquerors. How radical is that?! So really, my identity is something that I couldn't possibly attain by myself. And that's a good thing, because, like the verse in Galatians said, if righteousness could be gained by following a set of rules, Christ died for nothing. It's because of Christ's death on the cross that I have been given direct access to the throne room of God, and therefore access to everything I need to live a righteous life, following the example set by Christ, not by my own strength, but because of the strength made available to me by Christ. Good thing, too, cause I SUCK at life most of the time when I try to do it all on my own. Not sure if there was really any point to this post other than working through my own mental process of asking the question that's on my mind, and then going through what I know to be truth, but it sure feels like the hug that I needed when I'm reminded of all that has been done for me by my very personal Savior who understands my every struggle and insecurity, loving me all along the way.